This is going to be titled either trust or truth. Actually I can't decide if I can talk about one without talking about the other. They are inexorably linked, and perhaps so much so that they cannot be separated into two distinct topics. Nor can I decide what their relation is; initially it appears to be causal, one has to be told the truth in order to trust; or one has to trust that the truth is being spoken, or when one feels there is no truth then there is trouble with trust. The more I think about it, the less simple it becomes. I believe we inherently trust that we are being told the truth. I believe we are geared to think that people would be forthcoming with their expectations, motives, wants, desires, etc. In that case, trust always comes first; it is only through our experiences with others that we learn to trust more or less, and that trust hinges on whether or not we perceive the truth from those with whom we have contact.
This is a little heady. I already find myself veering off onto a tangent; so I’ll bring it back. I tend to trust people at the outset; partly because I try to, partly because I believe if you give people the truth they’ll do the same. There is something to be said about believing in a person unless they show you otherwise. I can’t imagine living a life where trust has to be earned, even on the most basic level. I prefer to start fresh and trust and act accordingly, I believe people see that and respond. To do so otherwise would be to elicit the truthless-ness and untrustworthiness of a person.
There have been times, however, when that trust has been broken, when I feel promises given have been broken, when I feel like the truth has been hidden. What am I supposed to do then? Trust dies with lies, trust erodes when the faith I put in someone’s word backfires, and without trust in that person how do I distinguish what is truth and what is not? Not that trust is a binary thing; there are gradations of trust. Just as one can lose trust, one can gain it back again; though at a much higher cost. But how to begin?